Adding to the fire

Lately there’s been quite a bit of discussion regarding LGBT issues and the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Most of the recent debate has revolved around President Boyd K. Packer’s talk titled “Cleansing the Inner Vessel” http://lds.org/conference/talk/display/0,5232,23-1-1298-23,00.html in the latest General Conference. This debate has included several of my best friends, two of which I respect very much, even if they are quite opinionated, which is partly why I love them so much. Their arguments and thoughts are carefully constructed, backed by research and vast stores of public thought and study. This blurb, this string of rough thoughts is not even close to being as well thought out or eloquent as my friends’ arguments, but since this topic has been weighing on my mind lately, I needed to get it out into the open. As I listened to President Packer’s talk, I thought to myself “this could be the beginning of our belief that there would be divisions in the church in the latter days”. I think to some extent this might be true.

Homosexuality is likely the great moral question of our generation. Do we have the attention spans to deal with it properly? We don’t have the Women’s Suffrage movement of the early 1900s, or the Civil Rights movement of the 1960s and 1970s to deal with. Our dilemma isn’t one of visible gender or the color of one’s skin; it’s a much more internal, personal issue. And being such an intensely personal issue, I find it hard to reconcile or even state my feelings in any coherent way. I realize as I try to address some issues, I’ll gloss over or even completely miss other important topics, so forgive me. Ha! I just realized that I’m likely apologizing to nobody… At any rate, might as well dive in and see if I can’t get something of a decent rant out of this.

The issue of homosexuality has been well documented over thousands of years in humanity and lately it’s been somewhat fashionable to document it in nature. The choice/innate debate has been pretty well run through the mill, so it’s left to the individual to side with the staunch believers that it’s solely a choice (contrary to testimonies from the LGBT community), those who emphatically point to scientific evidence (let’s be honest, who can’t make statistics or “experiments” say what you want them to say) and that nature made them that way (then why don’t we see more human women eating their young?) or fall somewhere in the middle. Personally I believe that there are people who are born with tendencies that lean strongly towards homosexual behavior. These tendencies could be so strong as to easily lead people to believe they have no choice in the matter. The growing lack of personal accountability, the blurring of once clearly defined gender roles and the attitude that if you say something is bad or wrong then you’re a bigot, racist, or discriminatory all facilitates and enables society to accept previously taboo behaviors.

Clearly there are scores of people in the LGBT community, ardent believers in Christ who are deeply affected by traditional church’s stance against LGBT behaviors. Lately I’ve come across myriad stories of LDS teens who are being told that their feelings and desires are matters of choice and an affront to God. These teens fall into despair over the internal conflicts, and some sadly commit suicide. Depression is a subject I’m well acquainted with, and it’s a disease as much as it’s a reaction to situations or circumstances. Prolonged stress, compounded events and other factors make it very easy to think that there isn’t a solution to a given situation. It’s easy to think that there’s only one way out. And it is very tragic that anyone comes to that conclusion, even more so when they act on that conclusion. That being said, I think it’s wrong to blame any religion for sticking with its “guns (probably the wrong term for what I’m about to get into)” and not budging on issues of morality. What’s the point of having a moral code if you’re going to change it every time a special interest group pops its head up and starts calling you old fashioned (no, I can’t account for the LDS church’s shift in policy for allowing blacks to receive the Priesthood other than calling it revelation)? There are appropriate ways to deal with depression as well as thoughts on suicide, and blaming an institution is not one of them. Friends and family left behind will surely feel the weight of responsibility and wondered what they could have done to prevent it, but the truth is, a determined suicidal person, though there are signs, is hard to foresee and even harder to prevent. It’s said that most suicidal people do not want to die; they lack sufficient coping skills to help them deal with their problems.

In hearing some factions claims that the LDS church is hate-mongering, which is a rather chic thing to do in the era of the 30 second sound bite, they might do well in actually reading President Packer’s talk, posted above, or they can read this comment from Elder Holland quoted in an Op-ed. “Elder Holland spoke about other church leaders: "I'm reminded of a comment President Boyd K. Packer made in speaking to those with same-gender attraction. 'We do not reject you,' he said. '… We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you..’” http://www.deseretnews.com/article/700072199/A-call-for-civility-following-Mormon-Apostle-Boyd-K-Packers-address.html?pg=2

I’m reminded of the incident in the book of John Chapter 8 v 1-11. Heck, I’ll even post it here.

Jesus went unto the Mount of Olives.

And early in the morning he came again into the temple, and all the people came unto him; and he sat down, and taught them.

And the scribes and Pharisees brought unto him a woman taken in adultery; and when they had set her in the midst,

They say unto him, Master, this woman was taken in adultery, in the very act.

Now Moses in the law commanded us, that such should be stoned: but what sayest thou?

This they said, tempting him, that they might have to accuse him. But Jesus stooped down, and with his finger wrote on the ground, as though he heard them not.

So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.

And again he stooped down, and wrote on the ground.

And they which heard it, being convicted by their own conscience, went out one by one, beginning at the eldest, even unto the last: and Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing in the midst.

When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee?

She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.

I think the key verse here is the last, verse 11. Obviously this woman was caught doing something morally wrong, Christ knew it was wrong, the woman knew she was wrong, but He did not condemn her. He didn’t forgive her at that moment, but he told her to go, and sin no more. I think the right thing to do in this life is the oft repeated “hate the sin but not the sinner” mantra. True it’s hard to separate the two sometimes, heaven knows I’ve had my issues doing that, but it takes work, effort and time. That’s pretty much the LDS church’s official position. Individual members may struggle to adhere to that in one way or another, but if all members of every group adhered to that group’s official positions, the world would be a bit less complex.

Who decides what is morally right or wrong in society by the way? The majority does, they have say over the norms, values and mores that dictate the way we perceive things. Who am I to judge someone or a particular issue? I’ve wrestled with that question quite a bit, but I’ve come to the decision that I HAVE to make a judgment on issues if I agree or disagree with them. Thankfully we live in America everyone is lucky enough to not get beheaded or have relatives disappear for having a dissident opinion; we get to have different views. I’m not offended when people campaign for access to privileges that I have, but I hope people have enough respect for me to not be offended when I campaign against them if I disagree with them.

After Christ fed the five thousand, He taught some doctrine which was hard for some of his followers to accept. John:6:60, Many therefore of his disciples, when they had heard this, said, This is an hard saying; who can hear it? What President Packer said was very unpopular in many circles, and it certainly was against the beliefs of many in the LGTB community. If someone told you that a trait you had was innate and unchangeable, that you were beautiful and wonderful because of it, while the rest of the world looked down on that trait and said that it was something which, though the road would be long, hard and painful could be changed, which do you think you’d choose?

I believe that homosexuality is immoral. I believe it is wrong. I stand with the leaders of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I think that the term “family” pertains to a man and a woman. I believe the saying “Rome was not conquered by an outside foe—it fell from within”, speaking to Rome’s embracing of homosexuality, pedophilias and other vices will hold true to our society. I think the more we stray from traditional values, the less guidance and direction we as a country will have. I’m not saying guidance and direction as in divine aid, I’m saying from a moral standpoint. I do want to make clear that I feel deeply for the loss of anyone affected by suicide, regardless of the cause. I know that there are many issues implicit in my thoughts which I have barely brushed or haven’t even addressed at all. There are still issues out there which I’m still sorting through my thoughts and emotions such as “don’t ask, don’t tell” in the military. I think the biggest conflict in all this for me is that my absolute best friend in the world is gay, and I know that some of what I’ve written here goes against what he believes. I’m conflicted in wanting him to be happy and in standing up for what I believe in. I love and respect him.

Planning for the future...

I've decided that I'm going to be a hypocrite when I have kids. I'm going to tell them they can't quit something just because they're not good at it or they don't like it, even though I'm planning on doing just that with my Math class. As soon as I finish up this Math class and pass the following one, I'm going to do my best to forget any and all Math that I've learned in the past year. My kids however, will be subject to completing all their classes and anything else I deem "character building".
Also, last night D and I had a discussion about our future and what we wanted most. I said I wanted an inside dog and D talked about if we'd have a boy or a girl first... We went to bed last night and I had a dream about a fluffy little puppy, and D dreamed about a blond haired, brown eyed girl... I think we'll get a dog, and something tells me that D will get her little girl, just not now.

Time for an update....

I suppose it's time I updated the blog and give you a bit of a rundown of what I've been up to. Not a whole lot, other than starting school back up and getting married. Those two things have taken up a rather large chunk of my time. I enjoy being married, it's quite different living your life with someone else who is not just a roommate. I married D, the love of my life from previous blog posts. It blows my mind sometimes to think that I'm now part of a unit! I have a family of my own! It's pretty small, and it likely won't grow till I'm out of school, but it's cool. We have Family Home Evenings, which really aren't too complex, we do other family things, like attend a family ward in church. That was a huge adjustment. Last night we had members of the Bishopric over for a kind of "get to know you" thing. It was weird in a way. We're not just visiting the ward with the Grandmas and the screaming babies. We belong to it. D and I are pretty sure we're going to get called to teach the Primary or end up with the Young Men/Young Women program. I'll likely get into the Scouting program, which would be kind of cool.

I've switched my major to History, since for me that's the fastest way out of college. I ought to graduate in Dec '11, and then I'll look at getting my Masters, or just go straight into the job field. Poor D thought she was finished with school, but she's pretty much back in it, tutoring me in my Math and Spanish classes. It took a second for her to realize that the anger and frustration I was showing during Math wasn't focused or about her, but just the fact that I HATE MATH. She enjoys the Spanish (I hope) since it gives her a chance to practice her skills and stay on top of the language. We're slowly getting into a groove of life, how to work together, fix schedules together (for instance I'm no longer late because I have to get used to someone else using the bathroom/shower/sink) and relax together. It's a work, but it's a process which we both enjoy quite a bit.

For the Ladies

As I sit here in a terminal in Iraq trying to come home this Mother’s Day my thought naturally turn to my Mom. I wished that I could have called her, emailed her, something, but being confined to customs with poor internet access, I wasn’t able to. I thought about all the things she’s done for me, the years of care and selfless sacrifice all for me. There are blessed few people who would endure what children put their Mothers through. I don’t think it’s any secret that the vast majority of Mothers feel inadequate and as if they could have done better for their kids. I don’t think that any other producer of goods has the opportunity to see the fruits of their labors as sharply as a Mother. I love my Mom.

Anyone who has met me knows that I have my flaws and shortcomings, but that all in all, I’m not a bad kid. My flaws are my own, and the good things I do and know are direct results of what my Mom and to an extent, my Grandmom have taught me. From opening the car door, giving up my seat, to always trying to put women before myself, they have taught me the correct things to do. Over the years I’ve been able to hear their voices in my head giving me advice or telling me what I ought to do. “Jeffrey, you make sure you hold that door open for a lady. You make sure you stand up when a lady enters a room. You make sure you cook, clean, and help with the kids when you get married. You’d better open that car door. You always walk between a woman and traffic. Jeffrey, you treat women better than you treat yourself.” All this advice and more have formed into habits that I don’t fulfill as much as I ought to, but still comprises the core of my values.

One thing that has always bothered me is just how sensitive women are about themselves and their affects on others, and it’s usually in a negative way. Billions of dollars a year are made taking advantage of the sensitive self worth, telling them how they can be better, look better, or otherwise improve themselves. Ladies and Gentlemen, I fell in love with the woman who has my heart during our early morning jogs, when she wore no make-up, hadn’t showered; and in most times had just climbed out of bed. She’ll tell you that she looked horrible, or that she has other physical flaws, but honestly she couldn’t be more beautiful in my eyes. Now don’t get me wrong, I understand wanting to look good, and when you have a horrible hair cut or you don’t feel comfortable in your clothes it’s hard to have that confidence. Essentially, what I find most beautiful is that inner feeling of self worth, confidence in who you are, and your kind compassionate nature.

I’ve found a great deal of quotes from lds.org, and while most of these are indeed religious quotes, they can be applied outside the strictly religious sphere and applied to all women. I wish that the world would treat women as the princess and queens they are, instead of the objects or servants that we often portray them as.

"Girls, you are of great strength and support to the men in your lives, and they sometimes need your help most when they are least deserving. A man can have no greater incentive, no greater hope, no greater strength than to know his mother, his sweetheart, his wife, or his daughter has confidence in him and loves him. And men should strive every day to live worthy of that love and confidence.

President Hugh B. Brown once said at a Relief Society conference, “There are people fond of saying that women are the weaker instruments, but I don’t believe it. Physically they may be, but spiritually, morally, religiously, and in faith, what man can match a woman who is really converted to the gospel! Women are more willing to make sacrifices than are men, more patient in suffering, more earnest in prayer. They are the peers and often superior to men in resilience, in goodness, in morality, and in faith.” (Relief Society Conference, Sept. 29, 1965.)" 1

"As fathers we should have love unbounded for the mothers of our children. We should accord to them the gratitude, respect, and praise that they deserve. Husbands, to keep alive the spirit of romance in your marriage, be considerate and kind in the tender intimacies of your married life. Let your thoughts and actions inspire confidence and trust. Let your words be wholesome and your time together be uplifting. Let nothing in life take priority over your wife—neither work, recreation, nor hobby.

“Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it." 2

"Author Anna Quindlen reminds us not to rush past the fleeting moments. She said: “The biggest mistake I made [as a parent] is the one that most of us make. … I did not live in the moment enough. This is particularly clear now that the moment is gone, captured only in photographs. There is one picture of [my three children] sitting in the grass on a quilt in the shadow of the swing set on a summer day, ages six, four, and one. And I wish I could remember what we ate, and what we talked about, and how they sounded, and how they looked when they slept that night. I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing: dinner, bath, book, bed. I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less” (Loud and Clear [2004], 10–11)" 3

"President Ezra Taft Benson has stated, “Man is at his best when complemented by a good woman’s natural influence” (Woman, Salt Lake City, Deseret Book Co., 1979, p. 69).

In 1935 the First Presidency stated, “The true spirit of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints gives to woman the highest place of honor in human life” This has been confirmed by President Heber J. Grant: “Without the wonderful work of the women I realize that the Church would have been a failure”.

In preparation for that surpassing experience, it is important for you to learn now to appreciate the special gifts of the good sisters of the Church, whom God has so abundantly endowed with talents. Your eternal helpmate will gently hold you to your potential. She will give loving and thoughtful encouragement, as well as comfort and discipline. She will also lift you up when you are down and bring you back to earth when you are puffed up. She will bless your life in countless ways. As President Kimball said, “Brethren, we cannot be exalted without our wives. There can be no heaven without righteous women” (Ensign, Nov. 1979, p. 5).

In recent years a debate has raged about the equality of the sexes. Women are not in any sense lesser creations than men. In fact, they lose something when they are compared to men. President David O. McKay stated, “A beautiful, modest, gracious woman is creation’s masterpiece”. Daniel Defoe, the great English writer, stated, “A woman of sense and manners is the finest and most delicate part of God’s creation, the glory of her Maker. … He gave the best gift either God could bestow or man receive” (quoted in England in Literature, ed. Robert C. Pooley, 1963, pp. 261–62).

Surely the secret citadel of women’s inner strength is their spirituality. In this they equal and even surpass men, as they do in faith, morality, and commitment when truly converted to the gospel. They have “more trust in the Lord [and] more hope in his word” (“More Holiness Give Me,” Hymns, 1985, no. 131). This inner spiritual sense seems to give them a certain resilience to cope with sorrow, trouble, and uncertainty.

Any form of physical or mental abuse to any woman is not worthy of any priesthood holder. President Gordon B. Hinckley has stated, “I feel likewise that it ill becomes any man who holds the priesthood of God to abuse his wife in any way, to demean or injure or take undue advantage of the woman who is the mother of his children, the companion of his life, and his companion for eternity if he has received that greater blessing” (Ensign, Nov. 1982, p. 77). This, of course, means verbal as well as physical abuse.

A husband should always try to treat his wife with the greatest courtesy and respect, holding her in the highest esteem. He should speak to her in a kind and a soft manner, showing his love by word and deed. As she feels this love and tenderness she will mirror it and return it tenfold.

President J. Reuben Clark, Jr., referring to the faithful women of the early Church, Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of James and John, and the mother of Zebedee’s children, stated, “From that time until now woman has comforted and nursed the Church. She has borne more than half the burdens, she has made more than half the sacrifices, she has suffered the most of the heartaches and sorrows” (in Conference Report, Apr. 1940, p. 21).

The First Presidency of this church has said, “Motherhood is near to divinity. It is the highest, holiest service to be assumed by mankind” (Messages of the First Presidency, 6:178). The priesthood cannot work out its destiny, nor can God’s purposes be fulfilled, without our helpmates. Mothers perform a labor the priesthood cannot do. For this supernal gift of life the priesthood should have love unbounded for the mothers of their children. Men should give them honor, gratitude, reverence, respect, and praise. A man who fails to gratefully acknowledge his debt to his own mother who gave him life is insensitive to the Holy Spirit. I wish to acknowledge to both my mother and my wife a debt which is so great I shall never be able to repay it." 4

"I assure you tonight that I honor you, the women of the Church, and am well aware, to quote William R. Wallace, that “the hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world.”

Our beloved prophet, even President Gordon B. Hinckley, said of you, “God planted within women something divine that expresses itself in quiet strength, in refinement, in peace, in goodness, in virtue, in truth, in love.” 5

"We salute you, sisters, for the joy that is yours as you rejoice in a baby’s first smile and as you listen with eager ear to a child’s first day at school which bespeaks a special selflessness. Women, more quickly than others, will understand the possible dangers when the word self is militantly placed before other words like fulfillment. You rock a sobbing child without wondering if today’s world is passing you by, because you know you hold tomorrow tightly in your arms.

When the real history of mankind is fully disclosed, will it feature the echoes of gunfire or the shaping sound of lullabies? The great armistices made by military men or the peacemaking of women in homes and in neighborhoods? Will what happened in cradles and kitchens prove to be more controlling than what happened in congresses? When the surf of the centuries has made the great pyramids so much sand, the everlasting family will still be standing, because it is a celestial institution, formed outside telestial time. The women of God know this.

We men love you for meeting inconsiderateness with consideration and selfishness with selflessness. We are touched by the eloquence of your example. We are deeply grateful for your enduring us as men when we are not at our best because—like God—you love us not only for what we are, but for what we have the power to become.

We have special admiration for the unsung but unsullied single women among whom are some of the noblest daughters of God. These sisters know that God loves them, individually and distinctly. They make wise career choices even though they cannot now have the most choice career. Though in their second estate they do not have their first desire, they still overcome the world. These sisters who cannot now enrich the institution of their own marriage so often enrich other institutions in society. They do not withhold their blessings simply because some blessings are now withheld from them. Their trust in God is like that of the wives who are childless, but not by choice, but who in the justice of God will receive special blessings one day.

The prophet who sits with us today could tell us of such togetherness, when at the time of his overwhelming apostolic calling he was consoled by his Camilla, who met his anguished, sobbing sense of inadequacy and, running her fingers through his hair, said, “You can do it, you can do it.” He surely has done it, but with her at his side.

Notice, brethren, how all the prophets treat their wives and honor women, and let us do likewise!" 6

"Someone said, “When you teach a boy, you teach an individual, but when you teach a girl, you teach a whole generation.”

J. Edgar Hoover said that “the cure of crime is not the electric chair but the high chair”

Her self-esteem cannot be based on physical features, possession or lack of a particular talent, or comparative quantities of anything. Her self-esteem is earned by individual righteousness and a close relationship with God. Her outward glow is generated by goodness within. And her patience is much more apparent than any imperfection." 8

"To be a righteous woman is a glorious thing in any age. To be a righteous woman during the winding up scenes on this earth, before the second coming of our Savior, is an especially noble calling. The righteous woman’s strength and influence today can be tenfold what it might be in more tranquil times. She has been placed here to help to enrich, to protect, and to guard the home—which is society’s basic and most noble institution. Other institutions in society may falter and even fail, but the righteous woman can help to save the home, which may be the last and only sanctuary some mortals know in the midst of storm and strife." 9.

"I want to express my appreciation for the wonderful women of the Church. We love the women of our Church. We love them as deeply as our own wives, our mothers, our grandmothers, our sisters, and our friends. Someday, when the whole story of this and previous dispensations is told, it will be filled with courageous stories of our women, of their wisdom and their devotion, their courage, for one senses that perhaps, just as women were the first at the sepulcher of the Lord Jesus Christ after his resurrection, our righteous women have so often been instinctively sensitive to things of eternal consequence. We recognize, as one man has wisely said, that while we speak of the impact of one’s mother’s tongue with a lasting effect upon us, it is our mother’s love which touches us everlastingly and so deeply." 10

“One Thing Needful”: Becoming Women of Greater Faith in Christ By Patricia T. Holland

Mom, I love you.I try everyday to make you proud and live up to what you've taught me. Grandmom, Kelly, Laura, Emily and Tori, I love you too. I hope I will always treat you and love you like you deserve.To my friends and other loved ones, thank you for your example, for your patience, your smiles and encouragement. You are better than what you think you are. You are more than what the world will ever tell you.

Lennon and Obama

If he truly believed the lyrics in his song “Imagine” then John Lennon was a coward. Imagine there’s no Heaven, it’s easy if you try. No hell below us, above us only sky… Nothing to kill or die for and no religion too… Imagine all possessions; I wonder if you can no need for greed or hunger, a brotherhood of man… What a wimp. He might as well not have been born. What’s the point in living? I’m not saying that greed or hunger or killings are good things, but there really doesn’t seem to be any reason to live in his imagined world. What would be your motivation for anything? I’m grateful to live and to realize that some things are in fact worth dying for, such as the freedoms guaranteed by our Constitution and the Bill of Rights.

I recall reading “A Brave New World” in high school in which society has “evolved” to a point where people are controlled by drugs, mixing that with sensual pleasures and creating classes of society by selective genetic engineering. The parallels between the book, the song and what we’re currently experiencing as a Nation are enough to raise some eyebrows. I don’t believe that President Obama intends to destroy the free market, Capitalism, or the Republic under which we were founded (acknowledging the fact that we’ve since shifted more towards a democracy). I do believe that in his effort to do something noble and worthy, he’s in danger of doing just that. While I don’t believe to be an expert in much of what is going on in Washington or the faults or merits of every piece of legislation which is brought before the Congress, I do try to be well read on the issues. Being removed from the country has caused me to do more research than normal on the health care issue.

President Obama’s statement that the recently passes bill ensures “the core principle that everybody should have some basic security when it comes to their health care” makes me slightly uncomfortable. While I don’t believe that people should have to go without basic healthcare and that it should be affordable, I don’t think that the federal government needs to, or should ever get involved in something like that.

A wise and frugal government, which shall leave men free to regulate their own pursuits of industry and improvement, and shall not take from the mouth of labor the bread it has earned - this is the sum of good government.- Thomas Jefferson

I don’t like the idea of if I work hard and become wealthy, then I will be singled out and taxed because of my work ethic, smart decisions and to a degree, luck. Is it an appropriate time to bring out the flat tax argument? I know that people don’t choose to be poor, my closest friend struggled his whole life against the bonds of poverty, and I know it hasn’t been easy in the least. Health issues, lack of jobs and education among other things affect some people more so than others. To be penalized for not having health insurance, to restrict my choice of what I want to pay for, it just feels wrong. Is it unconstitutional to require people to have health insurance or pay a fine? They can require auto insurance for people who drive because you have a choice to drive or not, but you don’t really have a choice to be alive. Well yes you do, but we’re assuming the majority of people have some sense of self worth and are in decent mental health.

I wonder how all this will turn out. As far as I can see, it’s going to increase our national debt (if you didn’t know, the Chinese already OWN EVERYTHING) regardless of how much it promises to reduce costs in the future. How do you increase the amount of people covered while reducing costs? Lower quality of care? I hope that this doesn’t end up like Social Security, a good idea, just poorly thought out. The smart way for that would have been to just eat the up-front cost to provide for the older generation when it was passed, and then have each rising generation pay into their own accounts. Oh, and have the Federal government stop dipping into that pool of money for other things. We should take a look at how the President tried to shove this through, and why, since he's all about debating and bringing everyone together...

On a happier note, I ran in a 10k this morning! I came in 25th out of 149, with a time of 47:15; 2 females beat me, which is really awesome that they can run that fast! And one of them is 42, amazing. The theme for the race was Al Asad: Worst Beach Ever, All Sand, No Water”. It was a pretty crazy course, steep inclines on gravel roads, declines, more inclines. I swear one of the inclines was a ¾ mile stretch at a 15% or 20% grade. Oh and I started figuring out this whole Roth IRA thing. I thought that if you opened one up and dumped money into it, that was it. After 4 months of having it sit in the account and only earning $1.52, I was slightly frustrated. Turns out you have to actually figure out what you want to plug the cash into! So I did some research, picked one and I’ve made almost $37 in 3 days! Now that makes me happier.

Look out Al Asad!

Wow it’s been a while since I last wrote. I should probably give an update as to what I’ve been up to and how everything has been going. Shortly after my last post, my boss went on his two week vacation, and I moved out to Al Asad in the western deserts of Iraq. It’s a large base in terms of square miles, but population wise it’s rather small. It has more scenery than Taji does. We’re in a wadi, a dried up river bed, there are date trees all over the place. We have a stadium and a patch of desert where all the abandoned MiG fighter planes were left. MiGs are the Russian’s fighter planes and a lot of Middle Eastern countries had close ties to the Soviets in opposition to the USA’s ties with Israel. All that however is a different post. We’ve had 3 major sand storms since I’ve been here. One of them was at night while we were having Institute. We were discussing the dust of the earth, when the dust of the earth was pounding at the doors and windows trying to get inside. By the end of the lesson the room was smoky with dust. When we walked outside we found the storm had blotted out any remaining light that would have been left by night. Between those two things you couldn’t even see your hand when you stuck it out in front of your face.

It’s easy to realize just how fortunate I am over here. I don’t have any bills; the room I live in for free is bigger than the one I was paying to live in back in Salt Lake. I work about 50 feet away from where I live, I’m fed 3 times a day, well let me rephrase that. I have the chance to eat 3 times a day; the food is a couple steps down from what we had in Taji. It’s hard to live without Chicken Sandwich Monday. I can Skype with most people who want to do that, or I can chat online. My section has a trailblazer that we get to run around in when we don’t feel like walking. Life is good.

But life kind of sucks when you don’t have anyone to share it with. My unit deployed with just over 300 people, and we’re going to head back with just under half that. We’ve had people leave to go to other units to work. My boss’s boss did that. And since we’ve moved out to Al Asad our job here in country has shrunk considerably. We had a lot of people sitting around doing nothing, so we’ve been sending people home early. It’s harder than I expected it to be, watching almost everyone else go home. All but one of my friends have gone, and he’s slated to leave early next month. But I’ll be home soon enough, so no worries. It’s easy to get anxious.

I have been so busy since I moved to Al Asad. My boss went on his 2 week vacation, and his boss left to work for another unit. Guess who woke up one morning and realized that he was suddenly in charge? That’s right. Dang. I went from focusing solely on one aspect of things, to being expected to have knowledge about everything that was going on in not only my section, but also the sections that my boss’s boss was in charge of. Even though we went from having control and management of about 40 units down to about 3, the staff went from 18 people to just me. It was a bit stressful to say the least! I worked very hard, and tried my best to catch up with everything. I think it took me about 3 weeks to really get my feet under me. I had to plan out how my unit was going to move from Al Asad back to Texas. I was totally overwhelmed!

I came quite close to having a vacation myself when I first got to Al Asad. There’s a program for the troops over here that lets us go to Qatar for a few days and there’s stuff for us to do down there. Just a little get away really. I had begged to get a slot for that trip, and I finally got one! I was so excited about it! Sadly, two days before I was supposed to leave it was “suggested” that I not go because there was quite a bit going on still with the planning to get everyone and everything home. I had two people trained up to cover for me while I was gone, but it was deemed not the best choice for me to go. That was a huge let down. Once my boss finally got back and out to Al Asad, a month after I had last seen him, he tried to get another pass to Qatar for me but failed. He then told me that he’d let me take off for a week or so and wander the country as I pleased. I had my transportation guys set up flights for me for whenever and wherever I wanted to go so instead of flying stand by, I would have a reservation wherever I went. But the same guy who suggested that I not go to Qatar nixed those plans. Well we had some equipment that needed to be escorted to Kuwait! I was told I would be the escort for it, and that I could just take my sweet time getting back. Ha-ha go figure, but yesterday we found out that it doesn’t need to go to Kuwait after all. Dang it!

It seems that I won’t be going anywhere. Something tells me that if history proves anything, I’ll be surprised if I make it back to Utah with everyone else! But life has calmed down a good bit for the time being. It’s a relief to not have to work 12 hour days 6 days a week and have a 3 hour break on Sundays. While I wasn’t the only person assigned to my staff during that time, I was the only one who I could count on doing things correctly. I’m really looking forward to heading home! I finally talked Kelly into moving out to Utah with me! So I’ve taken care of my roommate situation! I’m way excited about it. It’ll be nice to get home.