Adding to the fire

Lately there’s been quite a bit of discussion regarding LGBT issues and the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Most of the recent debate has revolved around President Boyd K. Packer’s talk titled “Cleansing the Inner Vessel” http://lds.org/conference/talk/display/0,5232,23-1-1298-23,00.html in the latest General Conference. This debate has included several of my best friends, two of which I respect very much, even if they are quite opinionated, which is partly why I love them so much. Their arguments and thoughts are carefully constructed, backed by research and vast stores of public thought and study. This blurb, this string of rough thoughts is not even close to being as well thought out or eloquent as my friends’ arguments, but since this topic has been weighing on my mind lately, I needed to get it out into the open. As I listened to President Packer’s talk, I thought to myself “this could be the beginning of our belief that there would be divisions in the church in the latter days”. I think to some extent this might be true.

Homosexuality is likely the great moral question of our generation. Do we have the attention spans to deal with it properly? We don’t have the Women’s Suffrage movement of the early 1900s, or the Civil Rights movement of the 1960s and 1970s to deal with. Our dilemma isn’t one of visible gender or the color of one’s skin; it’s a much more internal, personal issue. And being such an intensely personal issue, I find it hard to reconcile or even state my feelings in any coherent way. I realize as I try to address some issues, I’ll gloss over or even completely miss other important topics, so forgive me. Ha! I just realized that I’m likely apologizing to nobody… At any rate, might as well dive in and see if I can’t get something of a decent rant out of this.

The issue of homosexuality has been well documented over thousands of years in humanity and lately it’s been somewhat fashionable to document it in nature. The choice/innate debate has been pretty well run through the mill, so it’s left to the individual to side with the staunch believers that it’s solely a choice (contrary to testimonies from the LGBT community), those who emphatically point to scientific evidence (let’s be honest, who can’t make statistics or “experiments” say what you want them to say) and that nature made them that way (then why don’t we see more human women eating their young?) or fall somewhere in the middle. Personally I believe that there are people who are born with tendencies that lean strongly towards homosexual behavior. These tendencies could be so strong as to easily lead people to believe they have no choice in the matter. The growing lack of personal accountability, the blurring of once clearly defined gender roles and the attitude that if you say something is bad or wrong then you’re a bigot, racist, or discriminatory all facilitates and enables society to accept previously taboo behaviors.

Clearly there are scores of people in the LGBT community, ardent believers in Christ who are deeply affected by traditional church’s stance against LGBT behaviors. Lately I’ve come across myriad stories of LDS teens who are being told that their feelings and desires are matters of choice and an affront to God. These teens fall into despair over the internal conflicts, and some sadly commit suicide. Depression is a subject I’m well acquainted with, and it’s a disease as much as it’s a reaction to situations or circumstances. Prolonged stress, compounded events and other factors make it very easy to think that there isn’t a solution to a given situation. It’s easy to think that there’s only one way out. And it is very tragic that anyone comes to that conclusion, even more so when they act on that conclusion. That being said, I think it’s wrong to blame any religion for sticking with its “guns (probably the wrong term for what I’m about to get into)” and not budging on issues of morality. What’s the point of having a moral code if you’re going to change it every time a special interest group pops its head up and starts calling you old fashioned (no, I can’t account for the LDS church’s shift in policy for allowing blacks to receive the Priesthood other than calling it revelation)? There are appropriate ways to deal with depression as well as thoughts on suicide, and blaming an institution is not one of them. Friends and family left behind will surely feel the weight of responsibility and wondered what they could have done to prevent it, but the truth is, a determined suicidal person, though there are signs, is hard to foresee and even harder to prevent. It’s said that most suicidal people do not want to die; they lack sufficient coping skills to help them deal with their problems.

In hearing some factions claims that the LDS church is hate-mongering, which is a rather chic thing to do in the era of the 30 second sound bite, they might do well in actually reading President Packer’s talk, posted above, or they can read this comment from Elder Holland quoted in an Op-ed. “Elder Holland spoke about other church leaders: "I'm reminded of a comment President Boyd K. Packer made in speaking to those with same-gender attraction. 'We do not reject you,' he said. '… We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you..’” http://www.deseretnews.com/article/700072199/A-call-for-civility-following-Mormon-Apostle-Boyd-K-Packers-address.html?pg=2

I’m reminded of the incident in the book of John Chapter 8 v 1-11. Heck, I’ll even post it here.

Jesus went unto the Mount of Olives.

And early in the morning he came again into the temple, and all the people came unto him; and he sat down, and taught them.

And the scribes and Pharisees brought unto him a woman taken in adultery; and when they had set her in the midst,

They say unto him, Master, this woman was taken in adultery, in the very act.

Now Moses in the law commanded us, that such should be stoned: but what sayest thou?

This they said, tempting him, that they might have to accuse him. But Jesus stooped down, and with his finger wrote on the ground, as though he heard them not.

So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.

And again he stooped down, and wrote on the ground.

And they which heard it, being convicted by their own conscience, went out one by one, beginning at the eldest, even unto the last: and Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing in the midst.

When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee?

She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.

I think the key verse here is the last, verse 11. Obviously this woman was caught doing something morally wrong, Christ knew it was wrong, the woman knew she was wrong, but He did not condemn her. He didn’t forgive her at that moment, but he told her to go, and sin no more. I think the right thing to do in this life is the oft repeated “hate the sin but not the sinner” mantra. True it’s hard to separate the two sometimes, heaven knows I’ve had my issues doing that, but it takes work, effort and time. That’s pretty much the LDS church’s official position. Individual members may struggle to adhere to that in one way or another, but if all members of every group adhered to that group’s official positions, the world would be a bit less complex.

Who decides what is morally right or wrong in society by the way? The majority does, they have say over the norms, values and mores that dictate the way we perceive things. Who am I to judge someone or a particular issue? I’ve wrestled with that question quite a bit, but I’ve come to the decision that I HAVE to make a judgment on issues if I agree or disagree with them. Thankfully we live in America everyone is lucky enough to not get beheaded or have relatives disappear for having a dissident opinion; we get to have different views. I’m not offended when people campaign for access to privileges that I have, but I hope people have enough respect for me to not be offended when I campaign against them if I disagree with them.

After Christ fed the five thousand, He taught some doctrine which was hard for some of his followers to accept. John:6:60, Many therefore of his disciples, when they had heard this, said, This is an hard saying; who can hear it? What President Packer said was very unpopular in many circles, and it certainly was against the beliefs of many in the LGTB community. If someone told you that a trait you had was innate and unchangeable, that you were beautiful and wonderful because of it, while the rest of the world looked down on that trait and said that it was something which, though the road would be long, hard and painful could be changed, which do you think you’d choose?

I believe that homosexuality is immoral. I believe it is wrong. I stand with the leaders of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I think that the term “family” pertains to a man and a woman. I believe the saying “Rome was not conquered by an outside foe—it fell from within”, speaking to Rome’s embracing of homosexuality, pedophilias and other vices will hold true to our society. I think the more we stray from traditional values, the less guidance and direction we as a country will have. I’m not saying guidance and direction as in divine aid, I’m saying from a moral standpoint. I do want to make clear that I feel deeply for the loss of anyone affected by suicide, regardless of the cause. I know that there are many issues implicit in my thoughts which I have barely brushed or haven’t even addressed at all. There are still issues out there which I’m still sorting through my thoughts and emotions such as “don’t ask, don’t tell” in the military. I think the biggest conflict in all this for me is that my absolute best friend in the world is gay, and I know that some of what I’ve written here goes against what he believes. I’m conflicted in wanting him to be happy and in standing up for what I believe in. I love and respect him.